Fierce Lessons (Ghosts & Demons Series Book 3) Page 6

  “So they can be killed.”

  “Oh, yes, of course. They just can’t be killed by natural causes. One of them died a violent death last year, as a matter of fact.”

  “How?”

  “He was shot by a policeman during a traffic stop. What should have been a charge of driving under the influence went awry when Alphonso’s man drew a knife. A man can live a long time but never mature.”

  “How many bodyguards are there?”

  “The dead one was replaced. There are six. There must always be six. Six is the mage’s power number. Chronos calls his familiars his Circle of Knives.”

  “Suppose we pay them to go away? How much is he paying them now? Victor has deep pockets.”

  “Alphonso pays them in eternal youth, Iowa. How much do you suppose that’s worth? Could a billionaire even begin to tempt these men from their mission to protect their master?”

  I drank my tea and thought a moment. “I’m not exactly inconspicuous, Merlin. I’ll have to walk among the Normies.”

  “You’ll figure a way around that.”

  I sat and stared at him, waiting.

  “Ah. You want a taste, to be sure I can deliver on my end of the bargain.”

  “Can you?”

  “A demonstration is in order, true. A simple bit of alchemy.” He disappeared into a narrow galley kitchen. I heard him shove pots and pans aside. A few minutes later, he returned with a powder. He poured it into my tea and stirred with a long silver spoon.

  “Drink,” he said.

  “How do I know you haven’t already turned traitor and that’s poison? Maybe you’ve already made a deal with the demons. They’ve already tried to kill me.”

  Merlin paused so long I didn’t think he was going to answer. “Huh,” he said. “I should have done that. Easier and, quite frankly, it hadn’t occurred to me. That’s good lateral thinking, demon girl, but my answer is that I’m still trying to get out of this life the right way, in the hope that I may earn a better position in the next.”

  I drank the potion. I felt woozy. My scalp tingled.

  “How does it feel?”

  “Like Head and Shoulders shampoo.”

  Merlin reached up to the ceiling and, with a dramatic flourish, produced a hand mirror, seemingly out of the air.

  I stared at my reflection. My horns were gone. Without thinking, I reached up. I could still feel them, thick at the base and just as substantial. I pressed their sharp points with the tips of my index fingers, almost to the point of bleeding. However, I could not see them.

  “That little glamor will last for a moment, but I can make your shame stay a secret for the rest of your life, I assure you.”

  “The rest of my life? That might not be much of an offer.”

  I stared into the mirror. There was the girl from Iowa who had a future after the war was over. A woman without horns growing from her head could get dates, marry and maybe live like the Normies. Well, even with the horns, I could probably get dates, but I wasn’t up for cruising weird fetish websites. How many guys were freaks for girls with devil horns in New York City? Surely no more than a few thousand. It’s hard enough to find a nice guy without adding complications like demon wars, devil horns and the rotten case of PTSD I was sure was in my future.

  “Bring Chronos to me,” Merlin said, snapping me back to reality. “After seven days, I will assume you are dead and I will pursue other remedies with the Ra. Ah, and there are your horns again. To tell you the truth, I don’t think they look bad at all. So sleek and shiny.”

  “Unless I get into death metal and pretend it’s Halloween every day, these horns are not going to make me happy, Merlin.”

  “I am sorry, my dear.”

  “I don’t think you are. You could solve my problem right now.”

  “A little quid pro quo is always an incentive. Until the battle demons break through to our dimension and start eating humans, ours is still a market economy.”

  I turned from him. “Betray us, and I promise you, I’ll find a way to make you sorry.”

  “Iowa?”

  “Yeah?”

  “You have ideals. Stick to them as long as you can. It’s a wonderful luxury to be young. You have not betrayed yourself yet. When you do give yourself over to your demon side, you will find your way back to innocence.”

  “I don’t like you.”

  “No one does. My scars — ”

  “It’s not the scars.”

  “But we have an arrangement.”

  “I’ll find Chronos and try to bring him back, sure.”

  “Good. Then it’s not necessary for you to like me.”

  Lesson 165: When an agreement starts with so much disharmony, it’s not going to end any better.

  10

  “Settle down and focus on the mission, Iowa. We don’t want all of Stanford to be flattened like your lovely little hometown.”

  I put down the teacup, stepped behind the wizard and kicked the back of his knee hard. As he went down, I got my palm under his chin and yanked his head back to expose his neck.

  “What if I took your head?” I asked.

  “It would be worse for me,” the old man admitted. “I’d just be a head. My body would live on until you had mercy on me and put head and body back together. You won’t do it so you can stop playing at it.”

  “Remind me why I shouldn’t?”

  “Despite the horns, you imagine you are on the side of good.”

  “I don’t think you believe in good guys and bad guys.”

  “Like Time and Death, Good and Bad are relative, too.”

  “What do you believe in?”

  “Your blind aspirations to dumb heroism.”

  I released him.

  He got to his feet and brushed dust from his knees. “I fear we have started off with too much unpleasantness.”

  “We started off with me drowning. I remember it like it was just a few minutes ago.”

  “It seems longer, doesn’t it?”

  “Not to me.”

  “I did mention Time is relative and — ”

  “If Mama were here, she’d say your pancake pile is a short stack.”

  “I don’t understand that reference.”

  “I mean you’re…what would Rory say? Oh, you’re a fopdoodle. A scullion.”

  “Admitted freely and so stipulated,” Merlin said. “I do have a parting gift for you, my dear.” He gestured to the sword buried in the stone. “Et voila!”

  “Oh, c’mon! Really?”

  “Why not? It worked for Arthur. I can make it work for you.”

  “You said that was a scam to get a plum job hanging out with Arthur.”

  “I admit, there’s a bit of the slippery carney in me, but you should be done with ordinary swords. The Lady of the Lake returned this sword to its stone for you years ago.”

  “I haven’t been in the Choir that long.”

  “Destiny awaits. Chumele told me you were coming long before you stepped inside the Keep’s gates.”

  He pointed to the sword in the stone. “Go ahead. It will give you great advantage in battle. Take it. If you are to be my champion, it will be easy.”

  I hesitated.

  “Heroes take risks, Iowa. Long before you, Arthur embraced his destiny. Are you still frightened to commit to yours?”

  “Choosing champions and monarchs based on who pulls a sword out of a…nah, never mind. I guess it’s no worse than the usual voting process.”

  “Do you still dream of living on a farm outside of a tiny village that is now burnt to the ground?”

  “Medicament wasn’t that small. The town was going to get a Krispy Kreme store next year.”

  “Are you a daring heroine or just a girl with horns playing at saving the world?”

  “I’ve done and seen too much now. I haven’t been ‘just’ anything since my boyfriend died and I started seeing ghosts and was shoved off to a mental hospital.”

  “I know you’re special. Are
you sure you know it?”

  I stalked over to the stone, and wrapped my hand around the hilt. The sword came out as easily as pulling it from a scabbard. I knew it would. I suspected that Merlin rigged the ballot box for Arthur, too.

  “So…” Merlin said. “You are not a scared girl.”

  “Sure I’m scared.” I was sure he was grinning under that mask. I wanted to smash it.

  “A long time ago,” he said, “that was the finest sword in the world. We called it Excalibur. In Welsh, we called Arthur’s sword, Caledfwich. She is ready for a noble quest again. The blessed blade has a new master. You should give her a new name. What will you call her, Iowa? Every sword needs a name.”

  “Excelsior,” I said.

  “Excellent!” the old man said. “That means — ”

  “Ever higher,” I said.

  “You know Latin?”

  “I know that Latin. It’s New York’s state motto.”

  “Ha! Very well.”

  “The blade is too long to be carried at your waist. You will have to sling it on your back.”

  Merlin produced a wand from his vest and, with a theatrical gesture, he tapped the breast pocket of his suit jacket three times. The wand disappeared up his left sleeve as he pulled a scabbard long enough to hold my new sword.

  It might have been a cheap illusion any third rate magician on a Carnival cruise could pull off. Or Merlin had defied physics in an astonishing feat that wasn’t an illusion. I couldn’t decide.

  He held the scabbard out to me in his left hand. Before I touched it, he shook it three times. On the third shake, his right hand held a short sword, as well.

  “The samurai always carried two swords, one for the battlefield and one for close quarters when combat became necessary indoors.”

  The short sword was the equal of Excelsior in artistry. “Thank you, Merlin.”

  “My gift to you, thoroughly blessed with all my power soaked through every inch of the steel. It will serve you well when the demons come. You prefer the katana to the broadsword, I know. However, the history in these blades will give you the power you need.”

  The steel was ornate. Dragons and tigers chased each other down the blade to the tip. I cut the air with a couple of test strokes. The weighted pommel balanced the blade perfectly, making it easy to swing. It was an exquisite weapon and not what I expected from a broadsword at all.

  “Ready to get going and save the day now?”

  “That’s what I do. Or try to do. Still don’t like you.”

  “Victor will give you all the resources you need, including the box to hold my old friend. I have already arranged it with him. He understands my predicament and would rather have me dead and happy than throwing in with demons.”

  I began to head back toward the door. “Is there a way to get out of here without a long cold swim?”

  “Not that way,” Merlin called. “You can take the ladder from the kitchen straight up to the armory. There’s a freight elevator, too. That leads to the second level of the underground parking garage.”

  “Why didn’t Anguloora send me down here using that? I drowned, for God’s sake!”

  “No,” the old wizard said. “You drowned for my sake. I had to be sure you were the right one to send. You demonstrated sufficient commitment to the cause, so thank you.”

  “Next time you want a commitment from me, let’s just spit in our palms and shake on it.”

  “You had Chumele’s prediction. You knew I’d come. You didn’t have to test me further.”

  The old magician sighed. “You know all those email scams? The ones from thieves claiming to be Nigerian princes offering to split ill-gotten gains with anyone who will answer their email? Pay a small fee, give up some information and they bilk the innocent and the greedy?”

  “Yeah. What’s your point?”

  “They are all written using atrocious, awkward grammar. It is apparent at a glance that the email is a scam, correct?”

  “Sure.”

  “The easily spotted ploy is part of the design of the deception. The letters are written so it is obvious to any reasonably intelligent person that it is a scam. But the grifters don’t want to snag smart people with their tomfoolery. They are searching out the idiots who will actually send them money. The dumber the letter, the better it acts as a screening device and the greater their chance of success. They only want to deal with stupid people.”

  “Can I get a nap between here and the end of this conversation?”

  He laughed. “Iowa. You see yourself as a force for good. I see you as strong enough for the task and dumb enough to want to make the attempt. Finding your way to me is how I know you are the right person for the job ahead.”

  “Dumb as King Arthur. Great.”

  “What the Arthurian legend leaves out is that anyone unworthy to hold the sword was tortured when they tried to hold it. Knowing they’d die if they weren’t the chosen one stopped many unworthy cowards from trying their hand at it. You are my champion.”

  “Don’t go anywhere until I get back.” I began the long climb up to a trap door in the armory.

  As I pulled myself up the ladder with my new sword on my back, Merlin called up from his pit of despair. “If you fail me, I’ll open a rift right into the middle of the Ra, right down here. The battle demons will boil into the Keep like wasps from a broken hive! Do not take long. I have waited long enough!”

  Lesson 166: When doing the right thing feels this wrong, you’re already screwed.

  11

  When I got to the room I shared with Manhattan at the Keep, I found a small scabbard hanging from the doorknob. Bad timing. I knocked anyway.

  I heard rustling and a giggle.

  “Manny?”

  “I’m in the Delta quadrant, Iowa. Come back later!”

  I spoke through the door. “I need to talk to you.”

  “Is it an emergency?”

  “I died today,” I said.

  “Are you dying right now?”

  I knocked harder. “Manhattan! I’m getting you out of greasing tanks and taking you to a place where there are palm trees. At least, I think they have palm trees.”

  I heard a thump as her feet hit the floor.

  She yanked the door open. Manny wore a neon yellow tank top, but backwards, so the cotton scooped under her bare boobs. “Dude! Palm trees? For real?”

  I looked at the ceiling. “Um…yup. We’ve got a mission and I’m leading it. Are you in?”

  “If you aren’t joking about the palm trees…and I guess you do sort of owe me considering I got demoted today for defending your honor and all that.”

  I glanced down for a moment, marveling at how far her brown nipples stuck out. I checked the hallway to make sure no one else was around. “I was thinking you’d owe me for getting you out of the kind of trouble you hate and into the kind of trouble you like.”

  “Who else is on the team?”

  “I’ve got some ideas, but I need a consult. Meet me in C&C.”

  “How soon?”

  “How soon can you ditch your playmate and get your armor on? I need Wil on this, for sure, but we need to pick out some Magicals. I’m sure Victor will have some ideas.”

  Manny opened the door another few inches and turned on the light. Wilmington waved from under the covers of Manny’s bed. Then she pulled the blanket over her head and waved me away.

  “Something wrong, Iowa?” Manny asked.

  “No. It’s just that I’ve never seen you without,” — I glanced down again despite myself, — “your glasses on. And that’s like the smuggest smirk on your face.”

  “In my family, we’re famous for our smuggiest smirkfests.”

  I leaned close to whisper, “You know she’s got a fiancé back in Vermont.”

  “Yeah,” Manny said. “But I’m here now and we could all die tomorrow. Gotta grab the happy now while we can.”

  I turned to go.

  “Hey!” she called after me. “Where’d
you get the cool sword? That’s not standard issue!”

  “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you. Get going. It’s been a long day and I only want to tell this story once.”

  I found Victor Fuentes sitting on his Swiss ball by his desk in Command and Control. He wore pajamas and a silk and velvet smoking jacket.

  “Good evening, Iowa,” he said. “What can I do for you?”

  “I hear you have a magic box that can hold a demon named Chronos.”

  “You’ve been speaking with Merlin.”

  “How long has this been in the works?”

  Victor tilted his head back and forth in a noncommittal gesture. “Told you I was working on a plan. We had to wait until the time finally came. I guess that’s now.”

  Manhattan and Wilmington arrived. Manny’s hair still looked mussed.

  “Brief us on what you know,” Victor said. “Then we’ll fill in the gaps.”

  Leaning on his elbows, Victor listened with steepled fingers and a frown as I filled Manny and Wilmington in on my harrowing encounter with Merlin. I somehow forgot to mention that I tried stabbing him through the heart, assaulted him and threatened to behead him. I was sure Manny would laugh, so I made a mental note to tell her later.

  “I had hoped this expedition would not be necessary,” Victor said. “Merlin proposed it long ago. What is your plan?”

  “Merlin gave me a sword and a target to kidnap, sir. It’s not like he’s handed over the blueprints and an intricate plan to a heist caper.”

  “Six guys in the Circle of Knives,” Manny said. “No problem.”

  “Six guys plus a demon mage,” Victor said. “And Manhattan? Have you already forgotten our talk from this morning?”

  “You said some hurtful things about impulsiveness, sir,” Manny said. “But the traits you don’t appreciate in me as an instructor are exactly what you need when shit gets real.”

  Victor turned to me. “You think you’re ready to command your own mission. Can you get Manhattan to take orders from you? She was a member of the Choir long before you.”

  “I didn’t join the Choir to give orders,” Manhattan said. “And I don’t have trouble taking orders from Iowa. She’s my sister singer.”